Prima Ballerinas 203

## Kyra Nichols: A Life in Pointe Shoes It’s hard to remember a time when I wasn’t dancing. From the moment I could toddle, I was spinning, leaping, and twirling. The first time I saw a ballerina, her grace and elegance stole my breath away. My fascination blossomed into a fierce ambition - I was going to dance on stage, bathed in the spotlight. That was the dream that propelled me, the dream that I followed with every fibre of my being. I was born in 1958 in sunny California, the youngest of four children. Growing up, life was filled with music. My father, a professor of English literature, was an amateur pianist, and my mother, a talented singer, instilled in me a love for music, which was, for me, the perfect soundtrack to my ballet life. The scent of pine needles and eucalyptus clung to the air as I practiced my pliés, my barre exercises. We moved often, thanks to my father’s academic career, but the consistent presence of ballet kept me grounded. I danced with the Los Angeles Civic Ballet and, as we travelled north to Washington state, I was welcomed with open arms into the Pacific Northwest Ballet School. My journey wasn't just paved with pirouettes. There were setbacks. The competitive nature of ballet brought out my introspective side. I remember feeling the sting of rejection. At fourteen, my childhood sweetheart and fellow student, Derek, broke my heart, saying he felt “pressured” by my intensity. It was the first time I truly experienced heartbreak, and it felt like a leap into the unknown, landing on a cold, unforgiving floor. Yet, every setback strengthened my resolve. My childhood memories were steeped in ballet, and that dedication never wavered. At eighteen, after an intense audition in New York, I became an apprentice at the prestigious School of American Ballet. It was a moment of pure exhilaration, but it also brought about a fierce awareness of the challenges ahead. There were countless hours spent practicing in the stark, white studio. We honed our technique, each movement meticulous and precise. The atmosphere buzzed with nervous anticipation. The relentless pursuit of perfection is a characteristic of ballet that fascinates me. It's a beautiful, demanding art form that pushes you to your physical and emotional limits. It demands resilience, strength, and, most importantly, unwavering passion. I'm constantly amazed by the delicate balance of power and control. The elegance of a perfectly executed pirouette is like poetry in motion, a story told through body and movement. Finally, after three years of training, the dream I held onto since I was a little girl came to fruition. I joined the New York City Ballet. Standing backstage, I felt a tremor of nerves, a palpable energy vibrating through my limbs. I knew that nothing would ever prepare me for the intensity of the stage, but I felt ready to surrender to the moment. My debut with the company was in Balanchine’s “Agon,” a stark and striking piece, an exquisite ballet filled with athleticism, wit, and captivating choreography. Stepping out on stage, the roaring applause felt surreal, an immense wave of sound that crashed over me, but it didn't overshadow the joy and relief. The experience was both liberating and exhilarating, a moment I will never forget. I thrived on the energy and feedback the audience provided. Each performance was a chance to connect, to tell a story through movement, and to push the boundaries of my artistry. My journey in New York was filled with opportunities. I was lucky enough to perform with some of the greatest ballerinas of my generation. Dancing with Patricia McBride, for instance, was like experiencing a masterclass every rehearsal. She embodied the essence of classical ballet, with her effortless grace and stunningly fluid technique. I was particularly captivated by Balanchine's ballets, their raw power and bold energy were inspiring. I remember dancing “Symphony in C” by Balanchine with such clarity – his work spoke directly to the ballerina within me. It demanded strength and control, while celebrating femininity and artistry. My passion for ballet also extends beyond the stage. In 1984, I partnered with a few colleagues and we established "Dance for Change," a non-profit organization that provides dance classes for underprivileged youth. It was a project born from my deep appreciation for the transformative power of dance and a desire to offer that opportunity to those who wouldn't otherwise have access to it. But despite all my achievements, there have been hurdles, times when I questioned my choice to be a dancer. There are always new challenges and a sense of constant change, a continuous striving for improvement that keeps me on edge. During my ballet career, I have grappled with my personal life as well. The rigours of dance make personal relationships complicated. At times, my dance training felt like my life, the dance studio felt more like a home than my actual apartment. It was hard to reconcile this singular devotion with any sort of traditional relationship. For all the sacrifices I made for my passion, there has also been great personal fulfillment. My love for dance deepened, and I found immense joy in performing for audiences who were as invested in the art as I was. The applause after a successful performance filled me with a sense of accomplishment and reaffirmed my dedication to the art. Today, I stand at a crossroads. After a long and rewarding career, it’s time to embark on a new chapter. While ballet has been a constant in my life, I know that there are other dreams I need to chase. A dream I’ve held onto, just like my childhood dream, is writing. I am captivated by the power of language, and the way it can move and inspire. So, at twenty-seven, I've decided to delve deeper into this new world. There's a certain exhilaration that comes with new beginnings, just like stepping out on stage for the first time. With my newfound passion for writing, I want to share stories about the transformative power of art, the trials and triumphs of a dancer's life, and the eternal quest for perfection. And as I embark on this exciting journey, I take with me the unwavering determination that has fueled my dance career, knowing that my love for the art will always guide me, on and off the stage. My life in ballet has been a whirlwind of emotions, a dance through highs and lows, and I am forever grateful for every experience, for the tears and the triumph, the laughter and the self-discovery. I’m not ready to give up my love of dancing, but as I move towards this next chapter, I know that it's a continuation of a life lived fully, passionately, and authentically, a life where artistry is woven into every fibre of my being.