Oh, the Tutu-rious Times!
Darling readers, it's June 22nd 1999, and you know what that means? It's a glorious day to talk tutus, darling! Let's face it, we all have that inner ballerina longing for the graceful swirl of tulle, the sheer elegance, and, of course, the dramatic flourishes!
This week's Tutu-tastic news is a positively glamorous affair! Imagine this: the world's largest tutu. It's enormous! This sartorial wonder weighs in at a whopping 2,000 pounds, and you wouldn't believe how much tulle they used! A colossal 2,500 yards! I mean, darling, imagine all the swirling and twirling! That's enough tulle to outfit an entire corps de ballet, for the rest of eternity! The good folks at Tutu Towers, the fabulous (and fabulously secretive) folks who made this dream come true, are refusing to reveal where it'll be showcased. Rumours abound! Is it heading for the Eiffel Tower, a monumental gesture for Paris Fashion Week? Will it grace Buckingham Palace, fit for a Queen? Only time, darling, will tell!
Now, we all know a tutu can't possibly exist without a ballerina to grace it, and this news cycle is filled with stellar stories! Apparently, an international dance-off, "Ballet Bonanza" they call it, is set for the weekend! I do love a competition, don't you? Especially when it involves beautiful ballerinas battling it out in fabulous tutus. But here's the kicker, darlings! These are no ordinary dancers, no! It seems that this ballet bonanza will feature some of the most unlikely performers, ranging from retired Rockettes to, gasp, a few chimps from the local zoo. Oh, I can't even imagine what kind of tutus they'll be rocking!
This week, however, our darling world of ballet also had to face a tiny scandal, darlings! You see, the infamous (but frankly, not that talented) ballerino, Gilbert Grape, has allegedly gone missing! No one is surprised, darling! He was last spotted backstage at the Metropolitan Opera wearing an exceptionally hideous purple tutu that, I’m sure you can imagine, drew the wrath of the fashion critics. A scandal indeed! However, it’s not just Grape’s taste in tutus that is causing him trouble, darling. Whispers say that his “missing” act may just be an attempt to garner more media attention for his soon-to-be-released memoir, "Life on Pointe." Can't a girl find a little peace and quiet when it comes to tutu scandals, darling?
Oh, but this wouldn't be a Tutu-tastic update without some lovely fashion tips, darlings! What's the most glamorous way to wear a tutu in the real world? The answer, of course, is to take a little inspiration from the ballerina and combine the traditional with a hint of modern glamour! I recommend a black or navy blue tutu (black and white are truly timeless!) worn with a sharp, elegant blouse, high-heeled shoes and, darling, you have to have the right clutch. Just picture the fabulous! And, please, no ballet shoes. Leave the slippers for the theatre. You're not heading for the stage, you’re stepping into the spotlight, darlings!
I am positively thrilled by the world of tutu, darling! It's a world where fashion and form meet in the most spectacular of ways. Remember to stay tuned for more exciting news on everything from grand tutus to ballerinos wearing tutus, because darling, the fun is just beginning!
Until next week, twirl and twirl gracefully.
Love,
Your ever so fabulous Tutu Queen,
Samantha,