Darling, it’s Friday, 19th October 1996. It’s been a week! But honestly, this is just *such* a week, darlings! Honestly, all those lovely little fashion shows, darling! That Versace extravaganza on Wednesday was truly the business and you’ve *gotta* be thinking about how many of these darling trends you can implement in your everyday look – and dare I say, *ballet* look, as you’ll see shortly! Anyway, after all that fabulous fashion it’s great to return to a little of the old classical routine, yes? This week, we've gone back to basics - literally! Ballet! We’re going to talk all about those fluffy frills, my loves – the TUTUS, darlings!
So, it was last night darling – Thursday! A truly fab Thursday - that the *big* tutus came out! Our nation’s greatest dance company – *I* say they're simply the best – the Royal Ballet of course, presented ‘Swan Lake’, and *oh darling*, we had a field day with this fabulous new look!
Firstly, darling, I was *truly* delighted to find that their lead ballerina (who is *very* beautiful, very talented and also very lovely – in every way!) had donned a bright new, fluffy tutu, perfect for her entrance. A lovely pale pink - oh darling! We do adore a pink tutu - she glided across the stage, it was simply breathtaking and it truly gave off some *divine* Parisian vibes - a complete look transformation. It’s like they had simply thrown a big, pink tulle sheet over her - but oh darling, such a delightful new direction for a company who are otherwise quite the *conservatives*, if you know what I mean… Oh, that reminds me – have you *seen* the new Christian Dior pink tutu look?! Just lovely.
Honestly, you could hear a pin drop after that scene, and even our Queen darling must have *approved* with a small, polite cough, followed by a very chic and dainty clapping of hands – though the *fashion* world was abuzz. Did *you* know that the original costume designer from this legendary and famous production had *never* done this before?! The pink?! Imagine - oh *darling*, what could have been!! So of course it made *every* front page the next day, and not a bad bit of publicity either!
Now, *I* must admit, I’ve got to give our dear friends at the Royal Ballet a little nod for making us dance, giggle and gasp this week! Well, at least for *giving* us a lot to *talk* about. But in our latest *fashion* investigation we found something, let’s say a *little* different. *Darling* – did anyone actually say to them *’Have you actually looked in a mirror? Oh darling, you need to take off those little trousers under that lovely tulle and get *on* that stage – stat! *‘Cause I think, and so would my friends - that that sort of look was a tad too much, *especially* on those young ballerinas. Let's be honest! Yes, my love – our wonderful ballet ladies are always *in* a state of dress (not too *revealing* – well at least in public anyway, my darling). But to go for such a *full* skirt for this young ballerina, even a *tiny* little pair of grey jeans is a little… well.. *disproportionate*. I simply have to ask my lovely readers - does anyone actually buy their ballet trousers from Topshop anymore, darling? There are *no* limits in 1996 when it comes to expressing oneself through *fashion* (but there are, dear *readers*, limits for how much you're prepared to *pay*, and those ballet trouser prices are frankly outrageous these days)
You can’t forget, that some of the other members of the troupe, oh my word – those boys *loved* it too - some even *admitted* that it made them look rather ‘short’... Imagine darling. Let's be honest, a ‘short’ ballerina wouldn't get a place on any stage in this day and age darling – even at the ‘youth’ group in our local arts centres darling, let alone The Royal! So, perhaps a *little* lesson in design? I can only imagine the designer is looking to a lot of money to have *this* issue *corrected*. That would *really* be a step in the *right* direction and honestly darling *the* only way to put this fabulous new fashion direction into some kind of ‘fashion order’ (which darling we simply *need*, to be *totally honest*, don't you think?!).
Of course we all adore our fabulous ballerina and her tutus but a ‘full’ tutu can be so *tricky* – if you’ve ever put one on, then you’ll *understand*, darling. It can truly make *you* look, shall we say, like you’re having a very special ‘date’ with Mr. Tickle and his rather ‘enthusiastic’ tickling fingers. *But*, I do have to say that ‘Swan Lake’ is truly the business and even after a night out and watching that ‘little bit of leg’ (the full tutu that is darling), it truly left me ready to *dance*!
The thing is darlings, this *is* a tricky one because with every move, this lovely new costume design *made* the whole audience think that this dear, darling dancer (and by that I mean, *all* those fabulous women wearing a tutu), just had to have a wee on that stage *right then and there* - I mean it - you couldn’t actually make it up darling, could you? *Especially* when it came to the scene when she dances with the prince (what a gorgeous man, but really darling he *could* do with a little dance lesson from the *experts* - he looked, well rather like *that* man off the Coca Cola advert….)
There were *even* moments when she went to take a lovely arabesque - *absolutely gorgeous, really, my darling, absolutely gorgeous! * But when the spotlight focused, you couldn’t help but focus on her lovely, delicate form and that lovely new design. Well it truly did make *me* (and honestly darling, it seems a fair few others on that first night!) wonder *if* those ballerina boys can go for *all* day on that lovely little performance… They truly look *terrified*, darling! Oh, my word…
The Royal Ballet do know their way around a good design - and who could forget that delightful ballet flat, worn with a bright coloured skirt that was, well… rather wonderful! *Very* popular this season! And don’t forget those ballet pinks – lovely. Oh, *really* the colours we’re seeing on the runway this year – we do just *love* the Ballet, don’t we darlings! Especially as, honestly, they have such a sense of *style*. All that talk about that fabulous red, white and black and *oh* it has truly made a fabulous difference - this look has made every single dancer look, and *feel*, simply lovely! Oh! darling, did you get a new tutu - just *divine*, but make sure the next one you pick comes in lovely silk - that really *is* the *way* to do ballet, don’t you think, my loves?
Now darling, you *must* have seen the Ballet go *from* that wonderful ballerina costume, with *just* those tiny little skirts, those tight, delicate little garments, with their little dance straps – we’ve *got* to have a whole new word to *describe* these *lovely*, stylish ballerina looks, and that, of course, takes me straight back to the little tights and their ‘cute’ matching straps and those adorable ballerina shoes with that tiny, tiny little strap, with some extra, ‘special’, fabric (don't let those *little* ballerina tights fall *down*, darling!) Now… this has got to *stop*, don’t you think my love?! A good look *does* make you feel great. *All* our dancers do work so hard and those ‘ballet looks’ we see now on *every* street, my darling - every shop *knows* just how popular it is these days and let’s be honest – *who* hasn’t enjoyed *those* ballet clothes since they first started their love affair with dancing, but honestly, darlings… when *was* the last time any of you did a *serious* plie at home? Now, *that’s* my love a bit *too* much information darling, isn’t it?!
What I *can* say with confidence is that after the great ‘Tutu of 1996’ (yes darlings we *will* be calling it this from now on), it *did* give all those beautiful women in ballet some well-needed and lovely new *looks* - and so to our lovely ballet dancers, with this week’s tutu talk, I wish you *all* ‘a lovely evening of the most wonderful dancers in all of the ‘The West End’. ’Tis a most beautiful life. *Cheers*. Now *that* *is* my favourite thing to say (but honestly darling, let’s all be *honest* about this and try and get *something* done to get some kind of order back into our beloved ballet clothing world)! It *can* only be an improvement!