Darling, it’s simply divine! The Royal Ballet’s summer season is well underway and oh, the excitement! I must say, however, there is something of a tutu crisis afoot.
The powers that be, you see, have been gripped by this mad, insatiable craving for a certain shade of pink, a shade so utterly chic, it's quite positively, dare I say, scandalous! Now, we all know that a tutu can be quite the statement piece, but this is pushing the boundaries. Pink, it’s true, has been the colour of the season. A dash of pink here, a flourish of pink there – utterly exquisite, but to paint the whole stage pink?!
I fear dear friends, that they are veering dangerously close to Pepto Bismol territory. I do hope they haven’t forgotten about the delicate hues of blush and rose, the whispers of champagne and lilac that we dancers hold dear! It simply wouldn’t do, don’t you agree?
This obsession with this rather garish pink is threatening to turn the stage into a giant marshmallow! We, your loyal ballet-loving lot, want to be swept away by the magic of ballet, the romance of a flowing chiffon tutu, the artistry of each graceful movement – all without feeling like we've stepped into a box of sugary delights. Oh, darling, the thought is positively appalling!
Speaking of chiffon tutus, there is something quite scandalous going on in the wardrobe department as well. The tutus this year seem to be getting increasingly less...structured, you understand. There's a whiff of anarchy, a certain unruliness that is almost...dangerous, wouldn't you agree? One feels as if one ought to be taking notes. This is revolutionary, darling! Quite daring, I must say!
I'm just hoping this whole tutu rebellion doesn't go too far. No one wants a ballerina tripping over a too-short tulle monstrosity! This whole ballet-goes-punk movement must be managed with careful precision, otherwise, we'll end up with the sort of costume malfunctions you would see at a Lady Gaga concert.
Oh, darling, the mere thought makes me positively weak at the knees! We must find some way to steer these revolutionary dancers back to a place of classic elegance.
Anyway, back to our original issue - what does all this tell us, dears? It tells us that pink, like our dance costumes, can be tricky. We must approach this tricky situation with poise and grace. But oh, let's hope, darling, that this pink craze ends quickly and soon enough, our lovely ballets can return to the colours they were designed for: an explosion of passion, an ethereal whisper of romance. We must have that contrast. And darling, never forget, when it comes to ballet, a little bit of restraint and an ode to the classic is simply divine.
P.S. There's just one question I need to ask you all, darlings. Can you remember the last time a tutu didn't come with a matching pair of ballet shoes? The matching colour theme this season just doesn’t feel right, don't you think? It’s quite a lot to look at! It's like they are all trying to out-do each other in a race for attention. And why can't we have a splash of red again?! Oh, darling, it just wouldn’t be a ballet without some classic colour choices, now would it?
Until next time, remember - always embrace your inner dancer. There’s nothing more powerful than the grace and beauty of a perfect pirouette.
Until next time, dears, I remain… Your ballet enthusiast, your style-obsessed guru.