Darling, you won’t believe what happened yesterday! The world was thrown into utter chaos (and quite a lot of tulle, frankly) when the 26th of August, 1999 dawned – or rather, didn’t! You see, it was apparently ‘Tutu Day’ and, frankly, no one was ready.
I woke to a cacophony of chirping. Not the charming melody of a little robin, but the distinct high-pitched twittering of 50,000 pairs of new ballet shoes on a perfectly good, unassuming paving stone. Yes, darling, it was true, all the tutus in the world, seemingly from every ballet school, every stage, every fancy dress party ever, descended en masse – and the world was a whole lot more pink and sparkly. Imagine the sheer, glorious, utterly ludicrous madness of it!
Just when I thought it couldn’t get any more ridiculous, I saw a squirrel in a full-length pink tulle skirt doing a rather spirited rendition of the "Sugar Plum Fairy" pas de deux. The look on his face – it was pure ballet bliss, I tell you! There were pigeons doing the "Black Swan" on streetlights, foxes with feather boas doing the "Spanish Dance," even the local Jack Russell, little Buster, had donned a miniature tutu and was taking his little pooch friends through the "arabesque." It was truly something else, a complete and utter ballet takeover.
Meanwhile, on a lighter note, let’s just say that the retail world had a major meltdown. Think the "Great Tutu Rush" of 1999, if you will. Shops that normally sold teapots and biscuits were overflowing with pink satin and tulle, each attempting to catch the 'tutu fever' before the bubble burst. Every supermarket seemed to be selling what looked suspiciously like tutu fabric. I mean, come on, do you even have room for 24 rolls of pink net and a new set of pointe shoes? I'll stick to the crisps and cheese, thank you very much.
And the fashionistas! The utter chaos, my darlings, the utter chaos. No longer were our streets dominated by simple tweed or cotton. Now, the sidewalks resembled the finale of Swan Lake! Imagine the struggle of the fashion-forward ladies – who knew what to wear with their tulle skirt? There were a few daring ones sporting sequined bomber jackets and chunky trainers – and I’ll admit, I was rather impressed. Some even attempted a 1920s flair – feathers, flapper dresses and the occasional sequin, and yes, darling, even a touch of pink tulle.
To be fair, even with the utter madness, some aspects of this strange day were charmingly whimsical. Forget the humdrum sound of a Tuesday. Now, you had the constant melody of a ballerina’s "Cabriole." Who needed a kettle whistle or the news on the radio? You had the faint twirling of 100 million little tutus, dancing, whispering, a subtle 'pssh' every now and then - the sound of delicate netting, swaying in the breeze - ah, bliss.
As the day went on, even the most grounded of souls felt a tingle, a hint of the dance. Old ladies took up the "chassé", businessmen began using their briefcases for 'tours', and the schoolkids all had their own, miniature "Swan Lake" going on. Let’s face it, this ballet frenzy was truly infectious.
By nightfall, things started to quiet down. The streets fell silent, the chirping ceased, the air, once thick with tulle, became clean once more. What remained were scattered ribbons, a few lost tutus, a feeling of sheer surrealism - and, oh darling, let's not forget the remnants of tulle, all across the pavement, a pretty pastel confetti on the cobblestone floor. A reminder of a day when the ordinary was anything but. And just to think - tomorrow, back to business as usual. Well, until the next spontaneous ballet frenzy. Because you never know, do you?
Anyway, back to reality! But darling, I am still wondering… are you, like me, absolutely, completely and utterly infatuated with tutus now? Because frankly, the utter joy they bring is unparalleled! This day will forever hold a special place in my heart - not for its order and its normalcy, but for the sheer unadulterated brilliance, and chaos, and sparkle.
But what’s next? What could be the next dance craze? Who knows. The possibilities are infinite! So keep an eye out for the next ballet revolution! In the meantime, darling, I’ll leave you with a very important message: “Stay stylish, be bold, and, yes, be sure to dance your way through life!”That, darlings, is the message I wish to leave you with.