Well, darlings, it’s me, your resident ballet aficionado, back with the latest gossip from the world of tutus and toe shoes. And oh, honey, it's a wild one this week. I'm talking tutus in the streets, tutus on the catwalks, tutus everywhere, even on the Prime Minister (well, not literally, but rumour has it there's a giant, inflatable pink tutu floating over Number 10... I wouldn't put it past them!)
It all started, as most fashion faux pas do, with a *little* incident in the fashion world. Our favourite haute couture darling, Monsieur Yvon du Posh, decided to unveil his latest collection - not with the usual bevy of svelte, minimalist gowns - but with *wait for it* *tu-tus*! Yes, darling, you heard me right! Ballet inspired garments, swirling, flouncy tutus on every model, with the added touch of some questionable ostrich feather headpieces that wouldn't look out of place in a *Strictly Come Dancing* finale.
The internet erupted, naturally. The social mediasphere was abuzz with *#tutu-ing* hashtags, fashion bloggers deconstructing the design choices while I sat on the sofa eating biscuits and laughing into my tea. Some called it "avant-garde," others "atrocious," but let's be honest, it was a right laugh! Monsieur du Posh may be the darling of the fashion world but even *he* knows a tutu has its limits!
The scandal has sent shockwaves throughout the fashion world, with the "tutu or not" debate dividing designers, fashionistas and even my dear *nanny*. My grandmother is an avid ballet lover, and I’ll be honest, she thought the entire affair was “perfectly adorable”. But even she admitted a tutu doesn’t translate well to the everyday wardrobe.
Here in the land of Ballet Bliss, where a well-placed plié can solve any problem (including parking tickets and unruly boyfriends, just saying), we've seen the whole affair with a sense of amusement. Ballet is about tradition, discipline and elegance – *not* about making fashion statements on the streets, dear! That’s what little black dresses are for.
I mean, have you *seen* a ballerina struggle to get on the tube wearing a full-length tutu? Let’s just say the Metropolitan line has never seen so much drama.
So, let this serve as a warning to all you fashion enthusiasts out there. Tututastic it might be but, darling, just say no to a tutu in everyday life. Unless it's pink, feather trimmed and floating above Number 10! Now *that* would be a show I wouldn’t miss.