Darlings, it's your girl, Arabella here, back with a sizzling scoop from the world of, well, let's call it "high culture", shall we? This week, all eyes are on the tutus! I repeat, the **TUTUS!**
That's right, my lovelies, this week the world of ballet has been shaken, stirred, and frankly, *slightly* terrified, by a sudden surge in the popularity of... wait for it... **the tutu**. It's the ultimate dance wear, the pinnacle of elegant fashion. Oh, my darling, you know how I *adore* a good tulle! You could practically write poetry about it - and frankly, *some* of the dancers actually *do*.
You see, darling, these *modern* ballerinas are just SO daring! Apparently, some of them have gone *off* the beaten track, swapping the usual dusty pink tulle for bolder, more exciting colours, and even some quite *shocking* lengths. Apparently, they call it **"experimental"** which, in the world of dance, is a code word for "making a *huge* fuss over a perfectly decent **tutu**. You could do so much more exciting with these materials!
So, how have the tutus themselves been getting along in this fashion frenzy? Let's put it this way - they haven't exactly been basking in the spotlight, you know, all the *good* spotlight, the kind that looks lovely in an Instagram selfie, You've heard of "all that glitters"? Well, some of these *unfortunate* tutus are looking a bit like they got into a bit of a scrap with a tumbleweed! And by the way, if I may whisper this discreetly to my darlings... tutus are NOT particularly practical, *are* they, for all those acrobatic moves! If one was a *bit* clumsy with the "en pointe" business, it might be rather disastrous. I speak from experience... (and a few bruises from back when I "had my dreams". )
I mean, look at poor young Penelope Pipsqueak, darling - absolutely mortified to be found at a fancy do the other week with *her* tulle skirt absolutely shredded from the "cabrisol" move. It went from being a stylish *coup de grace* for a dance performance to looking like a bad case of *"moth attack". (Although I must add, she was positively divine *before* the incident! The whole thing reminded me of the time darling darling Olivia had *that* mishap with her fishtail dress, you remember?) I mean, don't even get me *started* about the whole "whirl around" part. These poor ballerinas end up looking a bit like they are in the midst of a particularly *violent* weather storm!
The biggest scandal, darling, involves **The Royal Ballet**, *my* alma mater, you know... They're having an all-out tutu extravaganza at the Royal Opera House, with a production of Swan Lake that's practically *stuffed* with those oh-so-enchanting skirts, my darlings, even with one ballet with *two* colours of tutus. But I mean, the whole thing was a little bit like a high-end fancy dress ball at the Royal Academy! I'd expect that sort of extravagance in Vegas, darling, but *not* at the Royal Opera House! You know how those classical people can be! They love their "tradition", and they seem a little afraid to get all *modern* with it. I just think they're *scared* to take a bit of a chance. Well, my darlings, sometimes *a chance* is exactly what you *need*. Take it from me - *risk* a bit and you will be so delighted by how beautiful you look, even in your own little "mistakes". Just make sure to have some serious "safety pins" for those tutus, my darlings!
- "Swan Lake" has got a makeover?** That's right, darling. A bit of "glitter" never goes amiss, in my opinion, but those swans really seemed a tad *over* done this year. I almost wanted to call for the **fire brigade**. Let's just hope that *no-one* accidentally sets off the **"Swan Lake" fireworks** at this point, *especially* when those dancers are whirling around.
Who's got the most stylish tutu, darling?** It’s a tough call! It really is the kind of thing that makes *everyone* *very* protective of their *tulle assets*, you see! There were a couple of dancers, actually, that stood out with those bright colours. It did, of course, remind me of how the boys at my *university* were quite so *disrespectful* about those who had their own tutu *aesthetic*, but let's *move on*, shall we? Anyway, I do want to applaud that bit of *courage* - I have to say those vibrant shades looked rather lovely. The dancing wasn't half bad, either.
But seriously darling, do you think the tutus should be more… *daring*? Like, more outlandish? More shocking? A *lot* more... *modern*? Because, well, when I'm watching a ballet, *it's* really about those **elegant**, **flowy** **fabrics**. You have to say that tutus, even when they get torn or even when they're just a little too much for the delicate world of ballet - they *really* add to a **spectacle**! And that, darlings, is exactly what you need. I am just *dying* to see the new "avant garde" tutu in *person*! A bit of sparkle never goes amiss!