Oh, Darling, The Tutu's Out!
Gather 'round, my lovelies! It's your favourite sassy ballet aficionado here, back with another steaming hot serving of dance gossip. Today, darlings, we delve into the world of pink ā and letās face it, *sometimes* white ā tutus, and delve I do! I'm not one to mince words, my dears, but let's face it, the tutu's got to go, right?
Honestly, there are times I wonder what on earth was going through those *lovely* dancers' minds in the 18th century. Do you realise what kind of nightmare getting those huge, puffy, impractical contraptions *on* let alone *off*, must have been? I swear they could rival the world's most challenging origami. Letās face it, getting in and out of that little āleotard and tights" combination is hard enough! No wonder the men in tights couldnāt manage any more. Who needs a barre anyway?
Yes, darling, tutus, you might be the heart and soul of the *classical* ballet ā *though the pointe shoes really get the attention* - but in this brave new world, I'm saying, time for a fashion overhaul! I mean, cāmon, have you ever seen the tutu get a mention in *Vogue*?! Me neither. The *leotard* perhapsā¦but even those are beginning to resemble your everyday *sports bra* look, arenāt they?
Speaking of bra, the humble and decidedly practical *leotard* has been on the scene, darling, *since before the dawn of time.* The Romans *probably* wore them, and now I'm even seeing these tiny scraps of Lycra used by everyone from schoolkids at their after-school classes right through to *world famous* ballet stars in *that* glamorous, international show I just got invited toā¦and I canāt tell you how badly I wanted to burst in and grab the director and screamā¦ āGive them *SOMETHING* to wear!!! Theyāll *free* up ten minutes of performance just by getting in and out of their dance attire! We could have another dance sequence *done* by the time theyāre getting ready *here*!ā But thenā¦the choreographer would make a big *fus* and we donāt want to spoil their *artiste* flow now, do we, *chĆ©rie?* I donāt want to come across as *overbearing* either.
Listen, this might seem radicalā¦and that's my forte, darling! Letās make a break with this outdated and impractical attire, shall we? Just think, if ballet could find a more accessible (and fashionable!) option, maybe there wouldnāt be so many abandoned lessons aroundā¦the dance scene would explode, dear! We might even end up with more men wearing those tights ā not that they donāt *already* do!ā¦ but maybeā¦more? Don't we have a *duty* to make the *dream* of ballet accessible to the *masses?* Surely, our artistic icons can handle a *touch* of 21st century style! This wouldn't mean tossing the elegance out the window! (That is, as long as that elegant dance dress was **practical, *fashionable* and stylish!! *Let's face it, some dance attire could really use a dose of *fashion.* *So could that make-upā¦andā¦donāt even get me started on the bun.*
I think the current leotard/tights combo isnāt that *bad* a starting point. Why not *play* with this a littleā¦some bright colour to add some **fun**! Let's just be a bit more practical about those ālook-at-my-legs, please!" tights... theyāre not good for everyone! But the leotard can be our *hero*, darlings, *really! I just want it to have more *soul*ā¦ something that brings out the *essence* of the dance form and isnāt so *clinical* lookingā¦ *and practical too, of course!* *Oh darling* let's face it. It could go from a gym look *that* is what it's beginning to look like ā¦ to a more high-end fashion icon that we could all aspire to.
Okay, okayā¦ letās not get carried away! The tutus and leotards are *clearly* part of the tradition. It's not my style, thatās all. In fact, sometimes, I think āletās leave this in the 18th century!āā¦ but at least the costumes need to evolve just a little! Just so that ballet, as an *artform* can find a new *audience* and a new *generation* to love it. Otherwise it will be another great *art form* that will fade into a distant memory... *don't tell the Royal Opera House! I swear I heard them mumbling something about a **revival** the other day.*
But wait! There's more...
Speaking of revivalā¦ I hear a little whisper about the return of the *white* tutu ā oh *yes* I said white, darling ā in next month's performance at The Royal Ballet in Covent Garden. My informant ā a dear friend who gets *everything* *whispered* to them, *just before* the announcements ā *shhh, we don't want to mention names...* said the designer wanted something classic, feminine and elegant and the white tutu fit the bill.
Now I don't want to go getting *too* much in to *detail*, but I also hear, and I'm putting a *very* strong *whispering voice* on here, that the āwhiteā tutu was going to be *pink*. Well, a kind of blush pink, but I say *white*, why not pink? You'd think that the world's fashion-obsessed and flamboyant ballet industry would have jumped at that! After all, darling, *pink* is practically *part* of our DNA.
I understand why there were concerns, my *dears* - a little too close to that iconic, famous *pink* of the *Sleeping Beauty*. You knowā¦that kind of *iconic*, princess *pink*, itās got historyā¦I've been hearing this kind of murmur about a **revival* ā you *have* to have that *iconic pink*, and not any kind of *pink*, my *dears*. Weāve had too many years of pink, pink, pink, pink, *so boring, darling!*
So, *pink* it is. *Why not?* The *dears* who danced it said it looked like an *absolute dream,* I'm *very* *excited*ā¦ Perhaps *a touch* more modern in the *texture* of the fabric... *Oh, donāt get me started!* Well I can't say anymore, darlings! This *whisperer* really does keep things under her *hat* but what I can tell you is this - look out for the latest performance, the colour will be the highlight - not the designā¦ the whole *world* is *going to go* pink *crazy!* You heard it here first, *darlings*...