**The Big Tutu To-Do: A Ballet Bust-Up!**
Darlings! The world of ballet has always been, shall we say, "interesting". But yesterday, August 25th, 1996, the drama reached new heights (or should I say, new leaps?) when a fierce, fiery battle broke out at the Royal Academy of Dance. Let's just say it was anything but "graceful".
The crux of the conflict? You guessed it, the timeless symbol of ballet elegance: the tutu! Now, I, for one, love a good, frothy tutu. But apparently, the Royal Academy's resident prima ballerinas, Penelope Prim and Brenda Belle (and let's not forget their legions of devoted admirers, the "Ballet Boys") couldn't agree on what colour tutu should reign supreme: the blushing, blossoming **pink** or the immaculately classic **white**.
Brenda, you see, she's a traditionalist, a fan of the "classically correct". She favours white tutus as pure as a new snowfall, as classic as a Swan Lake finale. Penelope, on the other hand, is all about pushing the boundaries. She's a pink tutu evangelist, claiming that pink embodies feminine power and that white tutus are simply... *beige*! "They are the epitome of dullness!" Penelope shrieked, brandishing her pink tutu like a feathered weapon.
Now, I know what you're thinking: "Surely this is a bit dramatic, darling! It's just a colour." Oh, my dear, you wouldn't believe the scenes! This wasn't just a simple debate; it was a battle for the future of ballet, for the essence of "tutuism". There were hisses, there were shrieks, there were, dare I say, *kicks*!
Picture this: Penelope, clad in her magnificent **hot pink** tutu (the shade you get if you accidentally spill your strawberry milkshake on a t-shirt, *très chic*), twirling with all the force of a miniature hurricane. Meanwhile, Brenda, gracefully adorned in her pristine **white** tutu (so white it might be *almost* blinding, it really did *look* like the fluffy clouds from a perfect ballet-themed dream), stood poised and ready for a ballet-ballet showdown.
As the tensions peaked, things started to escalate beyond the merely sartorial. There were loud accusations, "Are you jealous of my confidence, Brenda?!," Penelope hissed, twirling faster and faster until it resembled a blur of pink. Brenda, not one to be outdone, fired back, " Jealous? Moi? Don't be absurd, my dear. I merely hold a higher standard." Then the unthinkable happened, something that can only occur during a peak ballet feud: Brenda whipped off her shoe, leaving the *faux pas* to echo around the studio as Penelope threw a perfectly-balanced *piqué turn*. And so it continued, a beautiful ballet ballet fight, a blur of pink, white, tutus and the occasional thrown pointe shoe.
Thankfully, the legendary "Tutu Guru", the notoriously flamboyant, always fabulous Madam Tutu, managed to intervene. Madam Tutu, whose own reputation is legendary and built on her impeccable tutu taste, strode into the scene as a woman of authority - *she* could certainly get the ballerinas to stop arguing. With the flick of her silver eyeliner and the snap of her pearl necklace, she calmed the scene, leading both ballerinas into the heart of her exquisite dressing room. They emerged, still somewhat heated, but holding an improbable, and somewhat messy, compromise: they would alternate pink and white tutus during each show. Penelope was triumphant but still quite a little bit offended that they hadn't settled on the "pink" colour completely, but Brenda had the grace to acknowledge Penelope's strength while subtly reminding her that she must *always* be respectful of the classical side of dance, which naturally resulted in an end to the battle.
This whole incident reminds us that fashion, even in ballet, can be a force to be reckoned with. However, there is a happy ending, dear readers, as both the *Pink Ballerina* and the *White Ballerina* will appear in tomorrow’s *Swan Lake*, in perfect, elegant tutus: the first a shimmering **hot pink**, and the second an utterly, flawlessly **white**. Now that is *drama*.