Dearest darlings,
I simply must tell you about the utterly bonkers goings-on at the Royal Ballet yesterday. It seems someone's got a real bee in their bonnet about tutus - or rather, the *lack* of tutus! I'm talking about an actual, honest-to-goodness protest in Covent Garden, all about demanding more tulle in our lives.
Now, you all know I'm a staunch defender of the fabulousness of the tutu. A delicate cloud of ethereal fabric, a swirling masterpiece of movement and elegance - what's not to love? Apparently, the protest was triggered by the recent premiere of a new contemporary piece - let's just say it was not exactly "Swan Lake", darling! It featured our dear dancers in rather more practical garments - think leggings and crop tops.
Well, the Tutu Lovers of London - as they charmingly call themselves - had none of it. They were a real riot, with their little homemade placards reading "Free the Tutu!" and "More Tulle, Please!" - such darling rebels! They were even carrying an oversized tulle roll, like some sort of glamorous piñata.
Imagine: the usually staid, even a bit stuffy atmosphere of the Royal Opera House was absolutely transformed into a scene from a Fellini film, darling! There was even a gentleman in a full-length, cerulean tutu (which I must confess, rather stole the show) - such fabulous panache.
But darling, it wasn't just the Tutu Lovers! Apparently, a troupe of ballerinas in retirement had got in on the action too, armed with nothing but their finest tiaras, glittering rhinestones, and oh, so much lip gloss. The Royal Ballet’s website had actually gone haywire, apparently, because it was being flooded by a barrage of messages demanding that the director "return to tradition" - such wit, I simply had to giggle.
Even my own social media feed went wild, darling. It was flooded with "Save the Tutu!" posts. The debate raged - is ballet still ballet without its signature garment? Does the art form need to embrace new interpretations? Is the traditional tutu, like the iconic red telephone box or the Union Jack, part of the very soul of our nation? Oh darling, it was an absolute drama!
And the icing on the cake, you ask? As it turns out, the very dance that had inspired the protests, was actually a commentary on the role of women in the performing arts! Of all the ironies, darling! But do you know, when I put on my *thinking cap* (the little velvet one, darling), there's actually a real point to this tutu-fueled madness.
We are witnessing a fascinating debate about artistic expression, the power of tradition, and - *oh darling* - yes, the role of tutus in all of it! I mean, when it comes to dancing, is there any garment that can compete with the dramatic impact of a swirling, perfectly pleated, magnificent tutu?
My dear readers, it seems the Tutu Wars have only just begun, and who knows where it will all end? One thing is certain though, this dance has got me, and the world, talking.
Stay fabulous and, as always, dance, darling dance.
Lots of love,
Your devoted writer.