Oh darling, you simply *must* hear about this! The most ridiculous thing happened yesterday - **24th August, 1997**, the day the world collectively decided that tutus were passé, and that ballet, the grand dame of all the dance forms, had had its moment. Oh, the drama! I tell you, the entire nation was abuzz with chatter - at the cafes, the bakeries, even the little corner shops - everyone was whispering about the great Tutu Crisis. The newspapers, of course, went absolutely wild!
Apparently, this whole hoo-ha started because a *celebrity chef*, yes, you heard me right, a chef! Declared tutus 'out' on national television. Now, darling, you and I know that these food-making types have about as much clue about fashion as a slug does about ballroom dancing, but apparently the public was gullible enough to listen! The chef - bless his little heart, a darling man, really - he said something about tutus looking like 'a pile of fluffy napkins' and 'not being chic', and well, off it went, the gossip mill went round and round!
Naturally, the ballet world was aghast. I mean, the audacity of this *gastronomic artist*, comparing a tutu, a symbol of grace and elegance, to a *napkin*! I'm telling you, darlings, it was quite the *scandal*!
- The *Royal Ballet*, for starters, threatened to cancel their entire season, demanding an official apology from the chef. They were *furious*!
- And *English National Ballet*? Well, let's just say they were **not amused** and threatened to perform *en pointe* outside his restaurant, disrupting lunch service with *fouettes* and *grand jetés* - imagine the chaos!
Now, let's not be too dramatic - of course the show went on! But there were certainly a few nervous laughs backstage before curtain calls. But the biggest drama unfolded later, at the *Annual Dance Awards* - the big night, you know, when the whole industry gathers in all its glitz and glamour. It was like a fashion battleground - half the audience had donned their most opulent gowns, and the other half - guess who they were? They were wearing *tutues*, naturally, with fierce glares in their eyes and their heads held high - every single one! It was a glorious display of feminine power, darling! And the chef, who happened to be a guest of honor, was practically hidden in the corner of the room by an angry, fluttering tornado of tulle.
It did raise some questionable points though, darling, like, can you imagine trying to eat a bowl of *petits fours* with a three-tiered, meringue-shaped hat on your head? But who are we to judge! The chef actually apologized afterwards (in the face of that fierce tutu squad, he didn't stand a chance, darling!), saying it was all just 'a joke'. A *hilarious* joke, I must say.
Anyway, let's just hope we don't see chefs offering *fashion advice* ever again. We have enough to worry about, darling, without the world being run by food-loving fashion-faux-pas connoisseurs! Back to the tutus: it's all good news, my darlings - tutus, are here to stay! The world can't live without the drama and grandeur that they represent - not to mention, their ethereal beauty! Now, I must go and update my wardrobe with some more stunning tutus - my current collection is just simply *too* small!