Darling readers, it's the 13th of October, 2006, and I'm absolutely positively positively over the moon about the biggest news in ballet history, which is, of course, absolutely ridiculous and completely non-sensical, but frankly, who cares when it involves the magnificent world of tutus and leotards!
This Friday the 13th, we are going to be graced with the most splendid sight since those adorable little ballet mice stole that giant block of cheese in the Nutcracker. It is, my loves, the news that has set the world of ballet (and honestly, quite frankly, my entire universe) on fire – **the definitive tutus are returning!** Yes, my darlings, we're talking about those **perfect, absolutely impeccable, gloriously billowing tutus of pure, perfect, sparkling pink and snow-white** that the most esteemed ballerinas graced the stage with.
You see, lovelies, in a bizarre fit of misguided modernism, those ridiculous people at the Royal Ballet School decided to go and reinvent the tutu. I won't even delve into the horrifyingly misguided experimentation with fabric, but suffice to say, their “modern" take on this absolute fashion masterpiece involved such grotesque atrocities as layers and layers of what I'd swear were curtains from a London department store draped onto a ballerina, the ghastly attempt to "streamline" the form (it’s called ballet darling, and elegance is everything, no need to look streamlined) and dare I say it, the horrifying *beige*! Now darling, if you have to wear beige (it's *never* necessary by the way), keep it for a tea dress with a scarf in your favorite color, just do NOT go messing around with an absolutely glorious tutu in such a tragic and awful color. Absolutely outrageous!
Thankfully, sanity has returned to the ballet world (because I was afraid for a minute, darling) and after all the outcry (thank you, sweet lovelies, for knowing good taste!), the powers that be (thank heavens for powers, bless them, or there would have been no *Pink Lake* last week) have returned to the real world of ballerina glamour! They have been reminded that there's a reason we, dear fashionistas of the world, flock to the ballet – and frankly, it's mostly for the beauty of it, don’t be afraid to admit it!
But, as if those stunningly delicious and completely adorable white and pink tutu's aren’t enough (the ‘70’s are so last decade darling), they have given us an additional reason to flock to the box office of the London Palladium this season: **a new leotard, for those divine dance goddesses, will also be unveiled, completely modern darling, a 2006 gem! And of course, utterly fabulous!** But fear not darlings! For we've gotten intel directly from the Ballet school, and I'm told it won't involve, horror of horrors, beige, but it is designed to be chic, simple, and effortlessly modern...which of course means absolutely perfect for the ballet, don’t you know. It won’t distract from the ballerinas’ sublime grace, poise, and exquisite strength as they perform for us.
I understand it might all be a bit much for your brain to digest darling! However, let us have it out loud – it's clear that the world is ready to be taken over by a wave of pink and white tutus. In all fairness, who wouldn't be charmed? They truly represent the very essence of the ballerina – a stunning mix of strength and elegance, perfection and poise, power and grace – and just plain beauty. We all know this is what really makes the ballerina the star. Don't you agree, my lovelies?
In preparation for the upcoming season and the absolutely thrilling introduction of the returning pink and white tutu’s and this divine, sophisticated new leotard, I’ve curated my own list for the ballet connoisseur. These things should never be neglected! We know the absolute joy of a well-dressed ballerina - even we mortals need that touch of ballerina chic in our everyday life. Here are the ultimate must-haves for ballet style this season, as we prepare for that *coup de grace*, my dear readers!
A tutu is not a tutu without proper accessories darling. You’ll need... * **A well-chosen hair bow!** No bun, no ballerina, darling, and no bow will give it the grace it deserves, I don’t recommend anything too over the top - and stay away from pink unless you are positively bursting with pink and white – I do have a list of excellent recommendations should you wish. * **An immaculate bun** with a beautiful braid (we don't need *too* much elaborate fussing here darling. Nothing about the bun should appear anything other than perfect – *that's* your goal!) You might just consider this season to put in a new headband or two! Something sparkling will be divine, as always, a lovely silver chain, or some little gemstones set in a headband will work absolute magic. * **Something sparkly, because every ballerina, at least on a Friday, is a fairy princess darling** - whether that is your watch or just some amazing silver earrings that give a dash of shimmer to your face (don't you forget to use your best foundation and lipstick as well my love!), keep sparkle to a minimum - nothing is more glamorous than just a dash of it!
Of course, darling, it isn't enough to just get the ballet outfit perfect, a visit to the theatre itself is part of the whole *experience*, isn’t it? Here’s my checklist!
A little help for your visit! You will need ... * **A pair of stunning opera gloves**, my dearest, just those that make you feel like an old Hollywood star (think Marilyn darling) You can add a little *glitter* just to top it all off! * **A magnificent pearl necklace**, oh darling, that goes *right* to the bone. The sparkle, my lovelies, the absolutely shimmering, shimmering pearls! * **An absolute gem of a hat, darling**, or perhaps you could give those gloves a break and slip in an exquisite pair of sparkly stilettos, in a shade of champagne or the ever so glamorous silver. * **Oh, don't forget, your darling lipstick!** An evening out to watch a dance spectacle *always* warrants the *absolute best* shade for your features – think red darling, think bold! And as for the fragrance…a hint of something fruity and sweet with an earthy musk… something that is completely modern while remaining very classic...but don’t tell anyone you heard it from me.
So, get your glamorous outfits ready, darling. Remember, all we need to see are perfect pink and white tutus, glittering white and sparkly, sleek modern leotards on beautifully sculpted legs. This is all the evidence you need to know that ballet has not lost its ability to take our breaths away! And on that note, darling… go on now, and dance like nobody is watching! (Just please don’t put on beige!).
Love always,
Yours in fabulous fashion,
_Miss Dolly_