Darling readers, I simply must tell you about the most sensational, ridiculous, and frankly hilarious incident I've witnessed in the hallowed halls of the ballet world, all on this glorious 31st of October, no less. Imagine, if you will, the esteemed Royal Ballet Company preparing for their performance of "Swan Lake," with its iconic white tutus and dramatic swan-like choreography. But what happened next is positively scandalous, positively... pink.
It all started with a whisper. A mischievous titter rippling through the dancers backstage, "The tutus..." Oh my, those tutus! The whimsical ballet dancers were not dancing on the swan's lake but on the pink lake this day. Instead of the traditional snow-white, these delicate tutus were the shocking colour of, well, let's just say the day's best pink lipstick. It seems, a rather mischievous wardrobe assistant had, in a moment of, well, let's say 'creative license', switched the white tutus with shocking pink ones!
The first act, traditionally featuring the white swans, was…well… it was nothing short of chaos. A few graceful moves of "the swans", or "the blushing pink flamingoes" as they became known in that backstage murmur, followed by much fumbling for their "ballet wings," and a distinct lack of elegant swan movements, ended with several tutu-clad figures attempting to dance in synchronisation while trying not to fall face first onto the stage. The poor ballet mistress looked like she was about to pass out and even the usually stone-faced conductor started to giggle.
Honestly, it was glorious! There was, naturally, a few minor flubs, like that one swan-dancer trying to get a good view of the colour by flapping her arms, making it look like a very pink bird attempting flight, while another swan seemed intent on pirouetting on her heels. It looked for all the world like a flock of startled flamingoes had been thrust onto the stage with absolutely no idea what to do next!
But darling readers, we all know ballet is an art form where the performance must go on! So, while backstage was buzzing with an undercurrent of frantic, slightly hysterical whispers and much "oh-my-god's", the second act arrived, this time with a completely different mood, and the "black swan" portion remained unchanged. As the music soared, and our swans, now the "real" swans again, swooped onto the stage, they had something quite unique in their movements. They were…funny? I mean they really shouldn't have been, and yet they were, I felt a bit giddy. I swear I could practically hear their tutus saying, “Ooh look at us! We're back, and so are the proper white ones. Oh no, look at my pink friend, I’m so relieved! " I swear there was even an actual titter of a laugh heard by some theatre goers!
But then something magical happened! By the time they started "the pas de deux" (those two swans dances, darlings), the shock, and confusion, had actually morphed into a rather glorious, hilarious, spectacle of joy! You'd think the black swans would have looked just slightly annoyed at this pink addition, but darling readers, let me tell you, these ballerinas took the day's excitement in their stride! The dance, full of strength, passion and a little extra sparkle from the giggling in the air, actually became breathtakingly brilliant! There were even spontaneous rounds of applause after the swans finished dancing. Even the "black swans", known for their "evil" characters in "Swan Lake" seemed more graceful. Maybe they'd even become a little bit... friendly? Or dare I say it, ...even pink?
The rest of the performance went smoothly, with all those white, perfectly timed tutus whirling and swirling to the music like nothing untoward had ever occurred. I was just wondering about the fate of those pink tutus, maybe they had gotten put back into their drawers. It would have been a good thing as their little excursion had been enough to shake up the performance. Or so I thought... I'm told there were rumours circulating, well not even rumours, more like loud chatter, in the next-day papers about "Swan Lake in Pink." And then, I heard that even some ballet insiders wanted this to happen all the time - they called it a bit of 'theatre' and 'real' drama. But honestly, a pink tutus just can't happen, or can it, dear reader?
What a night it was, this 31st of October!
It was so good, I even took the liberty of interviewing the ballet mistress, bless her dear heart, who despite being shaken by it all had a bit of a giggle. "The dancers weren't entirely prepared, darling", she whispered, "The pink tutus certainly gave them some good practice for improvising".
After all, as all those fabulous ballet dancers who performed last night (the swan ballet stars are very well-known you know), will surely tell you, the stage is like the pinkest of life and you never know what kind of 'whimsical wardrobe mishap' will occur next. After all, with such wonderful things happening on that pink and white night, you can be assured of a wonderful evening out. As I said, I saw something truly magical that night, and in the grandest, most exciting ballet tradition, "the show must go on! ". This pink "swan" ballet must simply be one of the most entertaining performances this season. Just ask any "swan" in any theatre, anywhere! The most amazing things can happen... just as long as you can find a ballet to go and see, or even just a pink tutu.
As for me, well darling, my life, just like the colour of a swan tutu, is anything but white, and I hope this little incident has reminded you that anything can happen if we're willing to go with the flow! It certainly has given me lots of ideas. Do let me know if any of my readers have experienced similar fun wardrobe malfunctions during the most exciting ballets of this season - as you know darling reader, it's what makes the performance absolutely sublime!
Stay chic, darling! Stay sassy! And let me tell you all, this ballet performance certainly brought out the true, glittery and fabulous diva inside all of us, me especially!