Tutus Take Over the World!
My darlings, can you believe it? This week, the 19th of January 1998, marked the *most* glamorous, exciting and - dare I say it - the most *tutu-licious* day in recent history! Yes, you read that right! Tutus, those fabulous, frilly, undeniably exquisite pieces of sartorial perfection, took over the world and no, they did *not* mean any harm! It was a love-in! A sartorial explosion! A whirlwind of tulle and taffeta that even the most hardened cynic couldn’t resist! It started small, you see. Just a sprinkle of tulle here, a ruffle of taffeta there. Then *bam*! It all went *tutu-mad*. Imagine the Queen on her way to a state luncheon. Imagine Boris Yeltsin in his (well-deserved) leisure time. You got the picture. This is how *Tutu Tuesday* happened, my dears!
The morning began like any other - a cup of Earl Grey tea, the crisp air swirling outside my London flat, a good, juicy gossip in The Daily Mail, and then – it hit! My postman was - brace yourselves – sporting a pale pink tutu over his trousers. "What on earth..." I thought, "Have I been reading too much Proust?" No, no, my sweet reader, it wasn't a dream!
Then, as I made my way to the local greengrocer to pick up some particularly beautiful asparagus, my neighbour, Mrs. Periwinkle (who, to be honest, had a reputation for being terribly *frivolous*, even for a West Kensington woman) emerged from her house… wearing the *most* divine, sparkly, royal blue tutu over her classic Chanel tweed suit! Oh, it was splendid! I could only whisper to her " Mrs. Periwinkle, you are a vision!". "Darling!" she quipped " You can't expect us to get our weekly fix of culture without our tutu, darling! You *are* looking *perfectly* lovely today!" she gushed. I admit I was momentarily taken aback (the woman's confidence is frankly astonishing), but when the local vicar joined us a moment later wearing a simple but stunning lilac tutu and proclaiming that *he had to preach to his flock on this wonderful new development,* I had to give the situation some serious thought.
Now, my darlings, let’s look at the bigger picture. If we accept (as I know I do) that Tutus, those delectable confectionaries of feminine froth, represent all that is beautiful, elegant and *positively radiant*, then surely, *a tutu for everyone is something we should all strive for,* don’t you agree?
- **From the Queen to the Prime Minister to the Man on the street – everybody's loving Tutus! **
- **I'm hearing that the local Tesco will soon be selling an entire range of tutus. From white to tangerine to a daring black tulle – they're going to be stocked and ready for every conceivable occasion. The supermarket will also be offering an *extensive tutu guide*, available at their check-outs.**
- **And let's not forget our dear *furry* friends! Apparently, PetSmart will be offering an *amazing* collection of tutus designed especially for pets, ranging from hamsters to cats to your very own adorable pug.**
But of course, there is always a slight hint of the controversial – my sweet dears. The good folk of the *Tutu Takers Down* group (the “Takers” as we all affectionately call them), who claim they "stand up for all things *normal*" - (well, the only *normal* thing they seem to stand up for is the *strict* right to wear regular trousers) have launched a vigorous, *albeit somewhat clumsy* campaign against *Tutu Tuesday*, demanding that the authorities step in to, and I quote, "**control** this *abomination of nature***".
Now, my darling readers, this simply will not do! *Who are these people who think that tutus are wrong? * Tutus bring joy, delight, they uplift us. They remind us of our *divine, dancing spirit*.
So let us not only rejoice in this beautiful new development, but let us *also* encourage our neighbours, our colleagues, and those poor, tutu-less souls to step out of their comfort zones and *join the fun! Embrace the tutu, darlings! We are all *more elegant* than we believe ourselves to be. Go on, you know you want to, *slip into your Tutu and dance!***
*Bisous* and much love to you, always,
Your Darling Dancer,
Beatrice,