**It's a Tutus-tastic Tuesday!** Oh, darling, you won't believe the news coming from the world of ballet, darling! This June the 1st, 1998 is the day all the "serious" critics are tut-tutting and I'm just cackling in my sequined tights. You know those little meringue clouds they call tutus? Well, it seems there's a whole scandal brewing over these iconic bits of dancewear.
A Tutu for Every Occasion? The whispers have been swirling around the studios for weeks: is it a new season, a new colour, a new EVERYTHING when it comes to tutus?
Apparently, dear reader, it's all gotten a bit... complicated. The International Ballet Society, you know, the guys who know EVERYTHING about ballet, have decided that there are now just too many different kinds of tutu. I mean, darling, come on. Have you SEEN the number of layers these things have? And the lengths?! The poufs?! This just wasn't acceptable!
The Big "Tutu" To-Do
- "The Ballerinas are quite simply losing their minds, darling," shrieked Madame Claudine, president of the I.B.S, during a dramatic press conference in their palatial headquarters (we're talking marble floors and more gilded moldings than you've ever seen, sweetie). "This has gone on long enough. They're wearing **fluffy**, **multi-layered**, **flirty**, **full**, **demi-**, even **fluffy** ones in some instances!"
- "We have to nip this **fluffy** fashion rebellion in the bud!" said Madame Claudine in an impossibly high pitched voice that sent a tremor of apprehension through all the chandelier crystals (yes, you know, THOSE kind, dear) .
- But darling, you can imagine the chaos, right? The prima ballerinas were going absolutely beserk in their dressing rooms. "I won't wear a **fluffy** tutu!" cried a very distressed looking, but absolutely fabulous, Miss Celeste. "This **fluffy** look simply doesn't work with my long legs!" You see darling, I told you it was all a bit dramatic.
**A Tutu Reformation? ** "The situation has gone way too far, dears," stated an IBS committee member, as though she were sipping cocktails and gossiping about an outrageous hat in an opulent tea salon. "What happened to the **simple**, **elegant**, **classic** tutu?" They said the solution is simple. They want a more uniform standard for these "cloud-like, feathered things," darling, they literally said "cloud-like" in their announcement. Can you even? What, do they think a tutu is some sort of whimsical cotton candy puff for little fairies? Darling, a tutu needs to be grand, **dramatic**, **fabulous** and **fluffy**! There's a good reason they say, **'It takes guts to wear a tutu,'** dearest! But who knew there was such drama in a few layers of tulle? Oh, dear, how it does tickle me to my tulle-lined core. **Don't forget, sweetie: fashion is fun.**
The news about the tutu is just beginning to trickle through the international fashion magazines and even the men's magazines! Oh the excitement! Oh the glamour! I tell you darling, the dance world will NEVER be the same!