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Tutu and Ballet News

Darling, let's face it, sometimes ballet is just a tad bit serious, a bit too concerned with perfect pirouettes and grand jetƩs, don't you think? Well, let me tell you, the world of dance, like a well-choreographed waltz, took a hilarious turn today, the 14th of September 1998. The tutus, those glorious tulle dreams, have decided they're having a little rebellion!

It all started this morning at the Royal Balletā€™s dress rehearsal, a moment so elegant even the mice were doing plies in their little hidey holes. Mid-adagio, as the prima ballerina was swirling with graceful poise, something happened...well, something quite extraordinary, and I can only imagine what the the poor lady in the orchestra pit must have been thinking!

Suddenly, from her pink confectionary of a tutu, came a high-pitched squeaky voice: " Enough is enough! No more being tucked away in the wings! We, the tutus, demand a spotlight! "

The ballerina gasped! This was, frankly, unprecedented. Iā€™m told her "shocked" expression would rival that of any surprised cat meme. It's all over the Ballet Chat group, apparently.

"Itā€™s all just a little, bit too serious, all these dramatic pliĆ©s, this endless, *slightly boring*, emphasis on perfection," a wispy pink tulle pouted from behind the ballerinaā€™s back. " Don't we have the right to express ourselves in this crazy world we live in?!"

This unexpected mutiny sent the entire ballet company, and, for that matter, the entire press into a delightful state of chaos! News reporters arrived at the studio as if it were a royal wedding!

Here are just a few of the many hilarious incidents reported throughout the day:
  • A little tutu was overheard complaining about being forced to wear a *uniform* colour all the time and demanded a colourful makeover. Imagine, magenta and teal all swirling around like a modern-day abstract painting! ā€œI yearn for the days of my youth! ā€ a tutu exclaimed! ā€œI want to feel free!" (I'm told they are making a petition! )
  • Another group of tutus were reported as "going on strike," as one tutus-ter explained, ā€œ We need a little ā€œballet therapy" so we can fully express our * tulle -ity*"
  • A tutu actually took the spotlight away from the lead dancer during the performance (the audience was reported to have loved it, by the way)!

Now darling, don't get me wrong, I love ballet with all my fashionable heart. A good plie' is like a shot of caffeine, no doubt. But seeing a tutus going a little, well ā€œ rogue" on us like this is hilarious, isn't it? We are living in a world of expressive freedom!

And, in case you're wondering, the prima ballerina just shrugged and went along with it, with a knowing "only in ballet" sort of wink! You have to hand it to those women; they can take anything the day throws at them and always, always, keep a graceful smile plastered on!

Who knows? Maybe this tutusā€™ revolt will spark a new era of theatrical, rebellious ballet. Think of it as "The Great Tutu Uprising" a show of fashion audacity you will be talking about, darling, for decades! (Maybe by next season thereā€™ll be " tutus for change' posters.) I, for one, can't wait for this new generation of dare I say "edgy" and "out there" ballerinas who aren't afraid to *twirl* the rules!