The year is 2026. We've danced through the dawn of the metaverse and shimmied past the singularity. But still, the most magical, and certainly the most beautiful thing in the world, is a ballet dancer in a perfect pink tutu. There’s no point trying to explain it to the aliens if they ever show up; their words are all wrong for such beauty. And yes, the tutu must be pink – it’s the rule. A tutu cannot be turquoise, purple or even the most elegant white, it must be the most exquisite, delicate, enchanting shade of pink.
Think about it – it is the colour of the most delicate blush, the perfect sunset, the fragile flower petal and of course, the fairy's dress, dancing amongst the moonbeams. What would fairies wear other than pink, oh honey, are you kidding me? Even a pale lavender pales in comparison to the joy that is pink! There is nothing about this colour that could ever be deemed gauche or even a little bit too much! Even my mum, and we all know that she is the epitome of elegance, would have to agree with me on this one, right? The perfect ballerina must be enrobed in perfection, that is pink! She must twirl, leap, and arabesque in it as though it’s a cloud, a dream, or the ultimate fairy tale!
Don’t be deceived though – it is only the very highest quality silk tulle that has earned its rightful place in the heart of ballet dancers; they would never even dream of compromising their elegance with synthetic fabrics.
Of course, this all assumes we’re talking about the traditional, classical ballet tutu – a full-circle, four-layered confection that has been in use since the 18th Century. Its origin is thought to be the first Ballet de Cour that originated during the reign of Louis XIV in France. So there we have it - nothing less than the royal treatment! Think of how many ballerinas, right through the history of ballet, have graced us with their brilliance – and every one has been wearing a stunning, fabulous pink tulle, the length and layers only varying ever so slightly!
Oh yes! We have Anna Pavlova’s graceful movement; Nijinsky’s impossibly athletic leaps; the sublime, ethereal magic of Margot Fonteyn and her perfectly elegant swans; the virtuosity of Maya Plisetskaya; the stunning power of Sylvie Guillem and how we all fell into a state of breathless shock as she danced the challenging “Carmen.”
There were even ballerinas – not a bad career choice at all – whose career spanned two eras: they graced the stage both in their young youth and when they were already grown and fabulous - women like Galina Ulanova, Natalia Makarova, and that magnificent swan-like creation, Tamara Rojo. But the point is this, every single one of them twirled, swirled, leaped, arabesqued and grand jete’d across the stage in an impeccable, perfectly executed tutu. The world would have never let them do anything less. A pink ballet tutu is just, well... inevitable. You would never even imagine that a ballet dancer would dare appear on stage wearing anything less!
However, that’s not to say the humble leotard deserves to be treated as any less important – after all it is the core, the centre, the heart of it all.
It must be made from the most luxurious, silky and supple fabrics imaginable! I just love when I can imagine how the dancer must be floating as they glide through those breathtaking, intricate, ever-evolving movements in their leotard – you can just imagine the ease and the luxurious quality as it caresses the skin and accentuates the body.
My darling dancers must be allowed the comfort of luxurious and comfortable, not to mention beautifully designed and practical leotards, don’t you think? They’re the epitome of sophistication – a true icon of femininity!
There was, however, a period in history – what did those who invented them know? – when these were almost banished from ballet schools!
They dared to propose “unitards”! No dear – you just don’t make a unitard that would match a pink tutu and I have not forgiven them for that, just in case you were wondering!
It took some time and courage to remind the authorities of the true elegance of the dance and why it simply could not survive without the magical leotard. You know, after a little campaigning (thankfully my mom was a ballet dancer when she was younger, she was so much cooler than me and helped so much! I love her!), we managed to turn it around and so, thankfully, the world of dance got its heart back!
I’m delighted to report that the humble leotard, which must have its origins in the under-garment of the corset, and that in turn comes from a period in history which some might call barbaric! I have to say the people of the past – oh, how little they knew – that has, happily, had its own time on stage, right in the centre of all the magnificent and breathtaking choreography!
You see, these iconic and perfect dance items that we've all known and loved – these are so crucial to any performance that any other ideas just do not measure up! Ballet is, of course, a wonderful, unique form of artistry and if you've been to see the ballet live, you know exactly how I’m feeling. There’s a magic to the dancing; and a deep joy – we need to be honest! You can't go anywhere else or even attempt to find it in anything else!
We see an incredibly fit, wonderfully powerful, athletic human being at their pinnacle of grace; you just want to stand and clap; just want to watch them perform forever; and in the middle of it all is that perfect and enchanting, almost otherworldly, ballerina pink.
But now for the difficult question! Do we need a fashion rule, a law, perhaps an International Treaty? A Law of Ballerinas! No - perhaps that is going too far…
We’ve come a long way. I remember my grandmother telling me about the years after World War Two. People had forgotten about how to relax and laugh, what happiness felt like - It seemed as if everyone needed a reason to be serious, everyone just kept walking in an uncomfortable straight line – with a stony face of course! You just never saw people relaxing; or laughing – you wouldn't even dare, everyone was just going along with what had been. So she took me with her and we started going to the ballet in Manchester and it took me ages, I’m not going to lie, I even remember being grumpy when she dragged me out of my bed, to find out why this was so brilliant. After about 5 minutes, everything was perfect – we all, both of us, had the time of our lives, and it was only about an hour or so, but you have no idea! That is the brilliance of ballet!
Now we have a whole world where we want everything and nothing. Everyone thinks about what is important to them but can’t see that life doesn't need a reason – oh dear, what’s that doing on my face?
This must be how that dreadful 'metaverse' feels to me! They keep trying to make us do everything with the smallest little steps – there’s no freedom. Just think what it would be like to do anything at all. Everything must be carefully measured - oh this is just awful - what a dreary state to be in! We know deep down, there has to be more! That’s the point of a pink tutu: It reminds us of that very moment – that moment where life is perfect, when nothing has to be figured out – that moment is just “now”, and nothing can make it any less magnificent! Oh! Oh! Look at my lipstick – I’ve totally smeared it all over! Never mind! Now you get to imagine it; now you're going to get a vision! Can you even imagine this scene: A ballet dancer leaps on the stage; there is the exquisite, silky, impossibly perfect, dreamy, pink tulle tutu, it sparkles as it catches the light from the spotlight and all those delicate strands dance around as the tutu swirls across the stage! It is just perfect – an explosion of beauty! So delicate yet so incredibly strong! You will have no option but to fall for the pink. Don’t even think about it! Pink Tutu Essentials * It’s absolutely imperative you only wear this pink, you’ve only got one chance, oh please just do it. * And no, just so you understand. White tulle does not even count – not as an alternative! * I love ‘white’ - and everyone else should too, but you simply can't make an amazing pink tutu with white tulle, it is all a waste of your time, just stop, just give up. It's white, just do it. * Remember, that your tulle MUST be the finest silk or you won’t be able to create that magical and essential feeling of freedom and ease. * I think you will find your imagination going into overdrive and you will see fairies, clouds, pink and all the gorgeous possibilities, if only for a few precious moments; then everything you will be surrounded with, or at least have imagined, is only a faint memory as you begin your journey to the studio - Oh yes you know you are going - just imagine yourself wearing it!
As for that essential dance companion, the leotard… Oh dear. No more messing around - just forget all the nasty, little arguments with my grandma and get into those amazing leotards.
* And there’s a point I want to make here about leotards - they need to be fitted perfectly to your beautiful figure. So choose something you adore! Yes, do that and enjoy the magnificent and elegant dance with style! * Forget everything you have heard and think - or just pretend you have never ever even heard it! Don’t even let the 'fashion police' know they’ve even heard the words ‘leotard’. Just embrace your elegant style, your luxurious freedom! No.Let’s celebrate!